Since I wrote a novel based around sex education, I’ve tried to pay attention to other books and movies that do the same. I reviewed Tom Perrotta’s The Abstinence Teacher, which I thoroughly enjoyed. This time, I’m reviewing Juno, a movie I enjoyed so much I saw it twice, the first time with my wife, the second time alone, so I could take a more insightful look at the story.
Juno is the story of a pregnant teenager who is trying to make sense of her difficult circumstances. Ellen Page, who plays Juno, makes the movie. She’s not only funny, but she appears wise without taking things too seriously. Juno is the geeky guy’s best friend, someone you can talk to, jam with, but you’d forget she was a girl unless she reminded you – and that’s how she gets pregnant. She reminded the cheese on her macaroni, before he ever knew he was.
I enjoyed Juno because it was different; it was not a formulaic high school drama of fill-in-the-blank (studs, geeks, misfits, beauty queens, etc) against the cliques or the teachers. Nor was the movie a preachy lecture where everyone in one person’s life imposes values and passes sentence. Juno was not held up as a poster child for teen sex gone wrong. That would have lost the teen/college audience for sure.
Instead, Juno is a movie that a father and teenage daughter can watch together, and share laughs at each other’s expense after it ends. Election (1999), which starred Matthew Broderick, and was based on another Perrotta best-seller, is the only other high school based movie that comes close to the same achievement. No surprise; I saw both movies in person and they played well to all ages.
I could open my old high school yearbook, or anyone else’s for that matter, and probably find one girl like Juno, maybe two, but certainly no more. She’s noted as an oddball, but doesn’t stand out in any special way – except for her wit – and her untimely pregnancy. During a rare scene in school, pregnant Juno attracts silence and stares as the crowds allow her to pass undisturbed, although it is clear that she has been branded a marked woman.
But Juno is remarkably poised for her age; she’s thought through what she wants to do – put the baby up for adoption – and she’s handling the pain with surprising humor. Juno is the bravest girl in school, and she’s considered the freak. It’s unclear why that happens; Juno’s boyfriend/best friend’s mother was the only person who had given Juno a reputation. Maybe Juno’s classmates are afraid, not for her, but themselves.
Maybe the movie’s writer’s have left that for us to figure out.
It’s good meat for a father-daughter talk after the movie’s over.
After seeing Juno for the second time, I picked up a book, Restless Virgins, a non-fiction story about teenage hook-ups at a nationally respected New England prep school. This was a rare opportunity to take a back-to-back look at a movie and book along similar themes.
The authors of Restless Virgins, Abigail Jones and Marissa Miley, both graduates of the school, told a true story that appeared to be more like the formulaic high school movies: take the social cliques of the school, peer pressures, and mix them in with a scandal reminiscent of the Duke Lacrosse case. Only this time, the boys are expelled while the girl’s reputation is embarrassingly showcased in court. The school is spared no embarrassment as well; a headmaster is forced to concede that hooking up has been par for the course for some time.
I understand why a publisher took on Restless Virgins; the school is one of the nation’s elite and its’ students considered among the best of the best at gaining admission to the most selective colleges. We expect to be surprised when they behave just like “public school kids” who lack the same advantages. We expect them to abide by a code of conduct, inside and outside school, for the good of the institution, and for the sake of tradition.
But Restless Virgins showed me that the elite are just like anyone else, except that they can afford better lawyers. All high schools, public or private have their cliques and they change, while the traditions that should probably die take a long time to go away. This came out quite strongly in Virgins. The students were ready to ignore, or let go of the school’s past, while the administrators were asleep at the switch, incapable of cleaning up the mess.
Unlike Juno, there were no pregnant young women in Restless Virgins. But Juno MacGuff didn’t see sex as a game, or something she had to do, but something she wanted to do, with a guy she really cared about. The fictional Juno was far more mature, and also far more interesting, than the real-life cast in Restless Virgins.
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December 1st, 2009Teenage Pregnancy in Modern Society
November 30th, 2009Teenage pregnancy can be defined as an under-aged girl becoming pregnant with a baby that typically occurs out of marriage. In some countries, an under-aged girl is one who is not up to 18 years, though teenage age differs from one country to the other.Teenage pregnancy is a problem of great concern all over the world today. The rate of teenage pregnancy is in a progressive state. It carries social disgrace in many cultures of different countries. Poverty, illiteracy, irresponsible parenthood may be brought about by this teenage problem.Some of the significant contributing factors to teenage pregnancy are the lack of awareness about unprotected sex, early marriage, lack of sex education in schools, peer pressure, lack of parental guidance and a lot more. It can cause lasting devastation in the lives of both the mother and the child. Teenagers being immature will not be able to provide good nourishment and upbringing to the child. Besides not being prepared financially and emotionally at this confusing stage of her life, the mother will not be capable to give her best attention and love to the child which may further lead to irresponsibility towards the child.There is a greater probability that a teenage mother may give premature birth to a baby. This creates more serious risks for the baby. Some of the dangers associated with teenage pregnancy are retinal problems, development of bleeding in the brain, intestinal problems, sudden infant death syndrome and a lot of potential congenital defects. If it is fortunate that none of these happen, the baby is much more at risk to face a lifetime of unhealthy conditions.The primary solution is to uproot this problem by imparting sex education in schools. If teenagers will be educated on sex matters, their curiosity will not lead them to any harsh and poor decision making that could ruin their future. Society can get rid of teenage pregnancy by creating awareness among teenagers. It becomes the duty of every parent to advise their children on sex related issues. It is also important for parents to monitor the activities of their teens. Inculcating the right values, helping them to judge what is moral and immoral; the difference between good touch and bad touch and how to overcome peer pressure is what can solve this problem. Inability to address this problem of society will produce a generation of irresponsible adults who could ruin their lives with their own actions and consequently the lives of their loved ones.
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Study: Social Status as a Teen Predicts Health as an Adult
November 27th, 2009There is currently a consolation among middle-aged people who flinch at the mere thought of their adolescent days. A new Swedish study revealed that the social standing of an individual as a teenager may be a good indicator of his/her future health status.
Likewise, in a related research, British scientists discovered that mothers who venture into a work outside the home are more likely to have children who would later engage in lifestyles that are detrimental to their overall well-being — including poor eating habits and engaging in less exercise — than children whose mothers stay at home.
These two studies appeared online on September 29 in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health.
Ylva Almquist, the author of the study and sociologist at the Center for Health Equity Studies in Stockholm, said that the results of their study underlines the significance of acknowledging the fact that school is definitely not only about scholastic performance, but is equally so when it comes to the social interaction among children.
The proponents of the study analyzed the data from 14,000 children who took part in the Stockholm Birth Cohort Study, which monitored the long-term health status of Swedes born between 1953 and 2003. Almquist and her team particularly examined specific variables which include levels of popularity, power and status as perceived by the subjects in the study who were in sixth grade in 1966.
The information obtained by the researchers served as a personality baseline. They then analyzed the students’ health records spanning a 30-year-period from 1973 and 2003, with hospital discharge records as their primary focus. The researchers determined that the students who perceive lower levels of social acceptance as teenagers were more inclined to be at a higher risk of developing serious health problems as adults. This finding holds true for both sexes.
Here are the other significant findings of the study:
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Teens and Sex How To Talk To Them About Sexuality
November 22nd, 2009Sex is the last thing a parent wants to hear coming out of their children’s mouth. It is a nightmare and an unwanted thought when thinking about your child and sex at the same time. As they get older, there are some curious thoughts that go through their mind. Frightening as it sounds; communication is the key between you and your child when it comes to sexuality. We as parents cannot be there for out children 24 hours a day, all we can do is instill some experience and knowledge into their minds and hope it guides them intellectually to the right decisions in life.When you child approaches you about sex, take a deep breath, it can be an unnerving and an uncomfortable feeling… It’s not going to be easy at first, but in the end, you will feel better about talking about it. Ask your teen what lead them to ask you this question. If they tell you that someone they have interest in has brought it to their attention, then it is ok. Hopefully they have not done anything yet. With the way society is with our kids growing up in it, peer pressure can be a bit overwhelming and more likely some teens might give in to it.Explain to them that their body is a precious temple, keeping it pure and maintaining their virginity is a very rare and special thing. State that even though they might be thinking about doing it; they are simply too young for such an experience and the best thing to do is to wait until they are older and more mature. Inform them that just because you have feelings for someone it doesn’t necessarily have to be any sexual involvement, that there are consequences when having sex and even though your teen might think they know all about it, there is always more to tell.Unprotected sex can lead to you contracting a sexually transmitted disease, like gonorrhea that can cause inflammation of the genital mucous membrane, burning pain when urinating, and a discharge. It is caused by a gonococcus bacterium. Another disease to worry about is PID (Pelvic Inflammatory Disease) an inflammation of a woman’s reproductive organs in the pelvic area, which can cause infertility. Syphilis is a serious sexually transmitted disease caused by the spirally twisted bacterium Treponema pallidum that affects many body organs and parts, including the genitals, brain, skin, and nervous tissue, and Chlamydia, which can cause infertility, chronic pain, or a tubal pregnancy if left untreated. Many diseases can be contracted with oral and sexual intercourse. Oral sex is not safe and you still can catch certain diseases in your mouth.Love can be a cruel emotion. Let you child know that just because they feel strongly towards another person, it does not mean that their feeling are mutual. Sex can be the only issue with the other person; he or she could be out to use you for it. Help them to understand that if they are not willing to wait for the right time, then that person might not be such a good influence on them.Motherhood is a hard job; a child simply cannot raise a child. They have plenty of time to grow up, get their education and then they can decide if being a parent is what they want. Life is so good; they should be able to enjoy it while they can without any setbacks. Sex is a way of two people showing their love for one another. It is not something to take lightly. Giving up your virginity is a very important choice and you should not be coursed into it.Trust and communication is so crucial to you and your child’s relationship. Your child being able to come to you and talk to you about the most important things that are going on in their life is so necessary. Knowing how your child feels and what is going on in their life without being too concerned, makes an open and great relationship between you two.If you think that your child might go that way, then talking to them about birth control is an option. Sometimes talking does some good, but not enough and they still might end up having intercourse. Just be safe, let them know about birth control methods to prevent pregnancy. It’s hard I know, but you rather educate them and be safe about it, then to do nothing at all.Good luck, being a parent is hard work. We want the best for our babies, sometimes it is hard to separate the day they were born from the day that they became adults. We wish our children could stay the cute adorable babies that they once were. They have to grow up, there might be drama, rebellion, and a lot of hair in the sink, but in the end, we love unconditionally and appreciate every single moment.
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Teen Pregnancy And Teenage Relationship Dangers
November 22nd, 2009The first thing that you should understand when it comes to teenage pregnancy is that it is generally not planned. Most all pregnancies that occur with girls that are under the age of eighteen are unplanned. Teenagers who are involved in dating or relationships may feel compelled to engage in sexual activities with the person that they are with. This often comes as a result of peer pressure. In many unfortunate cases, it may come as a result of sexual assault, or even date rape. Teenagers should have a full and complete understanding of the risks associated with engaging with sexual intercourse at such a young age. They could experience health complications such as sexually transmitted diseases, and even become pregnant.
There are so many complications involved for a teenager that gets pregnant. Studies have found that teens are at a higher risk of having a child born with a birth defect. Common birth defects include cleft lip, spinal bifida, and even mental retardation. This mostly occurs because of the fact that the teenage body is still in the process of developing and growing. Then, it has the added strain of supporting a growing fetus. As a result many serious situations may arise. The fetus may not get the proper nutrition, the right amount of oxygen, and the development may be slow. In addition to this, the mother carrying the child can experience high blood pressure, gestational diabetes, slow weight gain due to high metabolism, and other problems associated with hormonal imbalances.
Steps to Prevent Teen Pregnancy:
1. Set a clear basis on the values that you have towards sex and also the attitudes that you carry regarding your expectations of your child’s sexual preferences. It is important that you are open and you clearly state what you believe your child should and should not do.
2. Do not be afraid to discuss sex with your teenager. Do not run from it. It happens, and it will if your child is not educated on the topic. It is your responsibility to be open and answer the questions that your child has.
3. Be certain that you specify to your teenager that there are always consequences to their actions. Inform them of the fact that there are many teenage relationship dangers and being sexually active, getting a disease, and becoming pregnant are three of them.
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Three Lessons to Teach Your Teen about Sex
November 22nd, 2009In a sad way, I find it somewhat amusing when mass media and some parents routinely propose or actually go ahead in giving their teens leniency in regards to breaking universal rules and values around dating and sex. I find this amusing because I routinely have young girls come in to see me or request advice via my website, about their realization that they have become pregnant, and lost as to what course of action to take. Recently I saw a fifteen year old, who was contemplating giving her year old son for adoption, because she had reached her wits end with him. The child, like any one year old, fast approaching his second birthday, has become more active and demanding for attention. These examples are just dealing with teen pregnancy and teen parent hood, I have not begun to go into the adolescent clients diagnosed with herpes, and yes HIV, I have seen in the past.
So yes, I find the glorification of sex with adolescents in today’s culture somewhat amusing because, no one ever brags about staying up all night with a crying baby, or being infected with HIV. If you are a parent, there are three lessons you need to teach your teen about sex.
Lesson One
Just as you sat with your toddler (or maybe not), and watched Elmo and friends shamelessly talk about the basics of potty training, you should sit with your teen and shamelessly talk about the basics of sex. From sexual attraction, to arousal, to fore play and intercourse. This difficult and needful conversation has to cover not just sex, but the science behind it. From the differences between the male and female genitalia, to what changes to expect during puberty, pregnancy and sexual transmitted infections.
Lesson Two
So you have gone over the bells and whistles of sex and it’s consequences with your teen, now what? Protection. That’s right, go ahead; talk about the use of a condom and it’s researched statistic, as well as the use of birth control. Condoms if used correctly, will work a hundred percent of the time, ninety-eight percent to account for human error. Then there is the science and timing of birth control pills, explain to your son or daughter what happens if one pill is missed, and the success rate even if the pills are taken on a consistent basis.
Lesson Three
This is the most important lesson of all, as it has to do with the “what if” scenarios. What if your daughter gets pregnant? What if your son gets a sexual transmitted infection, or becomes a father? The focus of this lesson is to teach your teen, that nothing is guaranteed or set in stone, and that their daily choices could trigger a number of infinite possibilities. As a responsible parent, your “what if” response should be tailored towards supporting your teen, but not enabling or bailing them out of trouble.
Teaching these three lessons will not eliminate the possibilities of your teen contracting a sexual transmitted infection or becoming a teen parent, but it will go a long ways towards decreasing the likelihood.
Ugo Uche MS., LPC
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Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children
November 21st, 2009You may recall that several years ago President George W. Bush appointed Joe Mcllhaney, a well-known advocate of abstinence- only programs, advisor to the CDC. In April 2002, Mcllhaney testified to Congress that there was no evidence that comprehensive sexuality education programs are “successful at all” — a year after Doug Kirby’s report for the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy documented this success. Now Mcllhaney has written a book. Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our
This article was reviewed by Marty Klein. PhD. an AASECTcertified sex therapist living in California. He can he reached at mk@sexed.org.
You may recall that several years ago President George W. Bush appointed Joe Mcllhaney, a well-known advocate of abstinence- only programs, advisor to the CDC. In April 2002, Mcllhaney testified to Congress that there was no evidence that comprehensive sexuality education programs are “successful at all” — a year after Doug Kirby’s report for the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy documented this success. Now Mcllhaney has written a book. Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children, claiming that science supports why sex is had for unmarried people, especially adolescents.
Freda McKissic Bush is his willing accomplice, a hoard member of Mcllhaney’s Medical Institute for Sexual Health, and a memher of lUish’s Advisory Council on HIV/AIDS, which favored ideology over established knowledge in biology, psychology, sociology, and economics. Hooked is a skillfully produced, emotionally manipulative, political tract. All sexuality educators will benefit from familiarity with it, because it’s a virtual primer of the tactics used by abstinence- only and sex-negative policy-makers, including:
• The sex-as-a-problem paradigm. The resulting policy goal is to minimize this problem, rather than finding ways to help young people celebrate their sexuality or use it for personal growth.
• Zero discussion of decision-making skills other than urging a simple refusal to engage in erotic activity.
• The recurring use of the word “children” to refer to biological adults who happen to be minors (i.e., age 17), or unmarried. Policy discussions about sexuality that treat 12-year-olds and 20-year-olds as a single category are based in ideology, not social sciences.
• A scientific-sounding discussion of “chemicals released in the brain during sex” which “can become addictive.” This rather old news is presented as a scientific “breakthrough,” without any mention of similar neuro-chemical activity that accompanies sports, eating, singing, and other pleasurable behavior.
• There is no discussion about how young Americans’ bodies now mature in ways for which society is unprepared (150 years ago, onset of puberty and age of first marriage were almost concurrent; that has changed dramatically). Similarly, tbere is no acknowledgement that society is responsible for most young people’s sexual difficulties by stimulating them sexually (as consimiers) and giving them enormous autonomy (privacy, cell phones, etc.), while deliberately withholding the information they need to handle the inevitable feelings and situations.
Sex for some young people will be negative and even damaging. There are good reasons to guide kids away from too-early sexual activity, along with other activities for which they are not yet prepared developmentally. The “reefer madness” approach of this book equips neither parents nor young people with the positive attitudes and communication skills they need to understand and shape sexual decision-making.
This book is a desperate cry from frightened, angry people who are more interested in the purity of their own ideology and religious visions than they are in actual young people. They are, in fact “hooked” on something far worse than the ”addictive” brain chemicals that help make life worth living.
Guard Your Teen Against Teenage Pregnancy
November 20th, 2009Teenage pregnancy is an issue of great concern today. A number of statistical studies bring to light the fact that approximately 34 percent of girls become pregnant in their teens. In some cultures across the globe, it is perfectly acceptable for a teenager to get married and bear children at such a young age. In many nations however, teenage pregnancy is a social issue that commands major concern.
Teenage pregnancy is rising at an alarming rate around the world. Teenage pregnancy could ruin the lives of both the mother and the child. A pregnant teenager’s life remarkably changes, most teenage mothers stuggle to handle a situation for which they are neither financially nor emotionally prepared. The mother will be subjected to a multitude of economic, emotional, social and various medical problems.
Teenagers are vital cogs of our society as they will subsequently steer the succeeding generation and shape them. They are undoubtedly the future of any modern society. If the valuable teenage years will only be wasted in child rearing, then we can’t help but wonder what the future will hold for them. What ought to be a formative period in the teenager’s life could turn out to be a very stressful stage and the consequence of which could be grim and long lasting.
There are various reasons that could lead to teenage pregnancy. Social scientists suggest that teenage pregnancy is the consequence of the lack of an effective sex education program. They claim that most teenage girls know nothing about the availability of birth control methods. Yet others blame the problem on the negative effects of media, particularly pornography.
The most likely solution to address the problem boils down to good parenting. Be your teen’s best friend, it may sound difficult but it would definitely pay dividends later on. First and foremost, learn to communicate and earn the trust and respect of your teen. This takes time and does not happen over night. Get close to your teenage daughter by providing answers to all her questions, you can’t afford those questions to be thrown to an outsider who may and most probably will deceive her when being asked. In most cases your teenager will find it difficult to ask, so parents should take the initiative and force the questions out by asking some questions themelves.
We can therefore resolve teenage pregnancy by fostering awareness among them. It becomes the responsibility of every teenage parent to educate their children on sex related issues. Imparting the right set of values, guiding them to judge what is moral and immoral, and how to overcome peer pressure is what can solve the problem. Brushing aside the problem will produce a generation of irresponsible adults who could ruin their lives and those of future generations.
In the event that your precious teenager accidentally gets pregnant, make her realize that she is not in a helpless condition. At this point, parents can reserve their thunder for other issues because their teen needs thair support and guidance more than ever. Teenage moms should realize that having a baby earler than expected does not mean that life is over. They should just have to find ways to live it.
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